Absense of Fear
by CloudNine
Summary: A different outlook on a Departure. A small twist to the end of season one. Just sort of dabbing into what was yet to come. I hadn't seen season 2 yet.


The breeze hits his face allowing his dirty, auburn hair to fly throughout the gusts of wind. He sighs, turning up the volume and rests one arm on his leg. His thoughts from the past weekend flood his brain. He remembers the Pod vessel that Tess has been constructing for the past year and a half. He remembers Maria, who he's found irresistible no matter how hard he's tried. He remembers the graduation a month before and the tears in Liz's eyes when Max told her he needed to love Tess. He remembers Isabel, and the more human she became, the more it scared Michael. It doesn't only scare him that she's changing; it scares him that he 's changing too.

Tess is planning to return home with or without the rest of the unit later this evening. Which is another reason why Michael needed the weekend. He needed it to think and gather his thoughts about which decision he was going to make.

He pulls into his driveway leading up to his apartment and got out of the car, slowly. Aware of the dark night and little light leading his way up to his apartment.

When he arrives there's a body positioned on the stool near the refrigerator.

"You've had us all worried." The voice mutters. "We had no idea where you were or—or when you would decide to return! You really scared us, Michael!" She let out, throwing her hands in the air.

"Yeah well, I knew I was gonna be sayin things I'd regret if I stayed. I can't live here forever, Isabel. I need to have some small fraction of a life…and right now I don't feel like I have the ability to do that…I'm held back-"

"You mean, we hold you back? What do we hold you back from, Michael? Returning home with Tess? Because, she is going back no matter what but it's your decision if you want to go with her! We're not holding you back; Max and me will be fine! Don't worry about us…not like you ever have." She mumbles under her breath.

"That's not fair Isabel! I've been there for you…through everything, but this is my time. I need to have time to find out what I've been missing all my life."

"Like what? What have we caused you to miss, Michael? What more do you want? You have people that love and care about you so much…what more could you need?"

"A family. Someone to call dad and help me with business things and a mom to talk about Maria with. A brother to discuss the new girls in school and a sister to tell me how inconsiderate I am…and the only one I could ever salvage that out of the way I've lived here is to return home, you have to understand that." Michael begs, reaching for her hand. She pulls away.

"I care about you Michael," She brushes her tears that slips down her tan cheeks. "I love you and I'm not ready to say goodbye. You've been like a brother to me…there's so much more to happen and-"

"Then come with me. Please Isabel. If we're really destined to be together then shouldn't we act on that? Shouldn't we return home?"

"Alex." Isabel mumbles.

"Yes, and Maria but they're not like us, Izzy. They're not one of us. There is no chance for us to have anything that will last with them. We both need to accept that." He shook his head and then lifted up Isabel's chin to face him. "But I we /I …you, and me and Max and Tess… I We /I can make it."

"Michael, after all this time…after everything that's gone on…this is what you want to do? Run away from it all? I'm not sure if I can do that…I mean, Max won't go-"

"You don't know that." Michael stands up, taking off his jacket.

"Yes I do, Michael! He's in love with Liz! Whether or not he wants to admit it now, he is! Just because you run away from something once you start having feelings towards it does not mean that Max does too! Max is not you! You make it sound like you got some alien handbook that fills you in how to love someone!"

"Hey, it's not called an alien handbook its called reality and you all need to have a taste of it. I spent the last week trying to figure out what I'm going to do…if I'm going to go with Tess or if I'm gonna stay here…I thought about everything. About Maria and your parents and Mrs. Deluca…I thought about Liz and Alex, but what I thought most about was about you and Max. Staying here is not a smart decision Isabel. In some way or another we're all gonna die unless we leave now." His finger is near her cheekbone and he can almost feel the heat of frustration coming off her face.

"I'll think about it…let's go find Max." She says, running her hand through her long blond hair and walked out of the apartment and down to her Jeep.

Without a word Michael gets into the seat next to her and watches silently as Isabel speeds to I The Crash Down. /I 

"Surprise!" A thrill of voices fills the café. Michael tries to be reasonable, but looking over at Isabel he knew this was planned and he knew that she was over at his house to get him to come to the party, his party, but he had ruined it for her.

"Well," Michael forces a smile and glances around the room. He sees Max first, Tess about a foot away. Liz is near the back, preparing something in the kitchen and Maria walks out, a tray in hand, drinks scattered around it.

"Happy Birthday." She kisses him gently and then hands him a glass.

"What is this?" He mumbles to Isabel.

"Your party." She shrugs and walks near the back of room.

"Attention!" Maria rushes back into the café from the kitchen and stands on a chair. The room grows quiet as everyone looks up at Maria. Michael then sees Alex and Kyle near the door. "Alright. First, thank you all for coming. Second, thank you Michael for showing up…Max had a feeling you'd be back and surprise, for once someone knew what you were doing. Anyway, thanks for showing up to your party! Happy Birthday, Michael…your present is later." She shoots a seductive smile then climbs off the chair, balancing on Max's shoulder.

The group's eyes flew to Michael who at that moment was speechless. How he was going to inform these people of his plans for the next few days was mystery to him.

"Don't you have something to say, Michael?" Isabel sips on her drink.

"Um, yeah…well, alright. I have decided to return with Tess. It's just what I need to do right now, so. I guess this is more a goodbye party then a birthday party, huh?"

The room fills with silence as Maria collapses in a chair.

"Michael," Max starts.

"Save it Maxwell…I've made up my mind and that's what I'm doing. You guys have your whole life planned out for you…it's handed over to you on a silver platter…but me and Tess, we have nothing, alright? Nothing but our soul, and at this point…home is where it's headed."

"This is home." Isabel mumbles.

"Yeah, maybe for you, but not for me."

"Michael…"

"Max! You can't say anything that will change my mind!"

"What if I go with you?" As soon as the words leave Max's mouth he looks at Liz out of the corner of his eye.

There is a silence again.

"Go." Alex speaks up, his arms folded. "Please…I mean, if that's what you need to do. Go. What's the point of needing someone when they don't need you? It's a waste of time."

"Alex," Liz sighs, her glazed eyes finally letting loose a few tears.

"No Liz. I am so sick of them pulling us on a string when all we're trying to do is care for them. Isabel, I've practically been on my knees begging for you for the past three months! I'm done! It's over!"

"Not yet," Tess spoke up. "You can't return home if something is holding you back."

"What?" Isabel glances at Tess.

"It won't let you…the Pod Vessel. So, if you have any doubt in not going then don't come, because this is our only way back and we're going with or without you." Tess looks at Max and reaches for his hand.

"You know what Tess, if you are in any way trying to make this easier, it's really not working, okay?" Maria shot out.

"I'm not trying to make it easier, Maria! I'm trying to be reasonable." Tess puts her hands on her chest and shot daggers with her eyes at Maria.

"Have you thought what it was like for us?" Max asks Alex. "Trying to let go something you love so much?" He looks at Alex.

"It didn't take you long." Maria mumbles, nervously nibbling on the tips of her fingernails.

"Liz." Max begins, ignoring Maria's comment, but he stops. He looks at her tear stained face. She shuts her eyes to block his words out, the words that she knew we're going to begin with an apology and end with his destiny. She'd already heard it twice, she wasn't ready to hear it again.

He knows what needs to be done and he'll do it. He knows he has to let go of Liz and return home.

Isabel glances at Alex then at Michael. She brushes her tears away with the swipe of her hand.

"We have to go, Max." She watches as Alex walks towards the window, upset with her response, pushing his hands roughly through his hair. Maria nears Alex, putting her hand on his shoulder.

"You're right." Max nods his head.

"You're doing the right thing, Max." Tess whispers, entwining her fingers with his.

He nods his head but no matter how hard he tries to believe that he can't.

"Are you gonna say anything?" Kyle suddenly spoke up, motioning towards departing people. "I mean, to the people that you told you loved? Come on! I don't expect anything, but I do expect you to say goodbye to them! Or atleast wave, or something!"

"We don't owe them anything," Michael stands up and glances at Isabel.

"That's right Michael, they've just saved your ass many times, but no…you don't owe them anything, right."

"Save it Kyle." Michael holds up a hand.

"Let's just go, okay?" Isabel spoke up.

"Wait. I have something to say," Liz speaks up, her chin trembling as she looks from each face. "We have been there through all of this with you…" A tear slips down her cheek. "You may have felt alone at times, but we have experienced too. You have implanted so much of yourselves in us…you have let us see more than is humanly possible. In return we have given you nothing. I mean…you shared with us a secret incomparable to anything and in return we gave you our phone numbers and immature reactions. But now…now we're willing to give you anything. Anything to make you stay."

"There's nothing you can give." Michael mumbles, bringing his lips tightly together.

"I have nothing left to give you, Michael!" Maria yells, throwing her arms out in frustration and hurt. "I have given you everything I possible can! Why! Why is it that I can give you everything and you can walk out that door leaving everything behind…leaving me."

He looks out of her, suddenly feeling short of breath. His eyes begin to water, but he pushes it away.

"I never asked for that."

Maria looks at him, starring into his eyes and then begins to shake her head. She turns around and faces the window.

"We need to go…it's almost time." Tess walks near Kyle, eyeing him, then walks out. After all the time she's spent with Kyle she is trying everything to not feel attached, that's what got them into this mess in the beginning.

Max walks after Tess and Isabel is the last to leave. She looks at the trio in the corner, her eyes fill with tears, the kind of tears that make you realize how human you've become. In a way, it was as if they were the ones that gave her the tears…and now she was leaving them and her tears behind.

"Are they gone?" Maria mutters, not turning around.

"Yeah," Kyle sighs.

"They're gone." Liz repeats to herself and then pushes herself closer next to Alex as if his presence would help ease the pain.

"It's okay." Alex pulls her closer, wrapping both arms around her.

"So I guess that's the end, huh? The end of everything." Maria mumbles, wiping her hand across her face.

"No, Maria. It's the beginning of something new." Alex sighs, taking one arm off of Liz and gently placing it on Maria's shoulders.

The breeze is heavier now and chilly. The kind of wind that hits your face like knives, hundreds at a time.

Max looks behind him for the third time.

"What Maxwell…you having regrets?" Michael asks, sitting next to Isabel as she drives.

He shook his head, then looking over at Tess. He places his hand on her cheek and smiles.

"We're going home."

"Finally," She grins, placing her head gently on his shoulder.

"I'm…I'm not sure if this is right." Isabel speaks up as they reach the Granalith, covered by the high Mexico mountains. She turns off the car and sits back, letting her words slide with a sigh.

"Why wouldn't it be Isabel? Think about what's to come…not what we're leaving behind," Michael reaches for her hand and she nervously excepts.

Tess reaches for Isabel's hand as Max holds on to Tess'. A connection is made and they head towards home.

"We need to clean up this mess." Liz is rubbing her eyes to stop the tears and franticly reaching for the party hats and tablecloths that her and Maria had set up only an hour before.

"Liz," Alex reaches for her trembling hand.

"No, Alex! Stop! We have to move on! We have to!" Liz yells, then collapses in a chair, breaking down.

Maria rushes to her side and sits down next to her, gathering her in a hug. She hushes her as the tears won't stop descends from her hazel eyes.

They hear the bells on the door ring. Maria looks up and her mouth feels dry. She begins to stand, but she finds that she can't. She remains in the chair until Alex rushes past her and past Michael. Not soon after Michael reaches for Maria and pulls her into his arms, kissing her. He kisses her with more emotion then he had ever kissed her. For the first time, he made the connection with her allowing her to see him, to see the real Michael Guerin.

"You came back," Maria whispers, her lips near his.

He kisses her again.

"Of course I did." He smiles, then holds her tighter

Liz lifts her head from her moist arms, covered in her tears. Her vision is blurry, but she can make out the body standing in the doorway the same way she had seen him for the first time. His hair scattered around his forehead, his lips slightly parted, and his eyes full of mystery and love. She stands up, and walks closer to him.

"Max," Liz whispers, swallows and then lets out a sigh. "I don't understand." She looks up at him.

"You were wrong when you said you didn't give us anything Liz…you gave me love and…that's more then I could ask for." He kisses her pulling her closer and letting his fingers run through her long auburn hair.

"Isabel." Alex shouts, running down the dark sidewalks.

"Alex," Isabel smiles, her eyes filling with tears as she walks up to him.

"I am so sorry." She shakes her head, tears slipping down her cheeks. He rests his hands on her cheeks.

"No, stop…don't apologize. You're here, that's all I need know." He kisses her again and then pulls her into a hug, never wanting to let go.

Tess continues walking after the rest of them stop at the café. She sees the convertible and watches as Kyle steps out of the car, resting his hands on the top of it.

"Why'd you come back?" Kyle yells, shutting the door.

"I don't know," Tess rolls her eyes. "But it wasn't me, Kyle! It's them! I want to go home and do what I've wanted to do since I can remember…since Nusaedo told me about home." She begins, walking closer. "And when Max told me loved me…all I could think about was you."

He raised an eyebrow and shook his head.

"But you didn't look back, Tess…you could care less."

"I just didn't want to get in too deep…it wasn't you, Kyle." She glances up at Kyle, her blond ringlets falling softly down her cheeks.

"I've heard that one before," Kyle mumbles, pushing his hands in his pockets. "So…why are you here?" He asks.

She shrugs, walking closer to him.

"What…do you think maybe I you /I got in too deep?" Kyle asks, a grin forming on his lips.

"Yeah, I guess you could say that," She smirks, then places her lips on her, wrapping her arm around him.


End file.
